Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

How do YOU feel when you see her?…

on August 23, 2012

I was inspired to write this post by “Being Her, (the other woman)…” Most of it is a comment I wrote to her…

My husband completely gave up on our marriage when I was working two jobs almost 5 years ago. He just stopped. He didn’t cheat, he just stopped taking care of himself completely and, in that, stopped taking care of me. I was the one who cheated. I found someone who would cherish me and to take actual care of me and my needs. I had no idea how good that would make me feel. I had no idea…

Being with my lover taught me all about appreciation and not taking things for granted. We have been together now for 4 years and I appreciate him every time I see him. When I am angry at him, I take a step back and ask myself if I am being selfish and if I am truly mad at him for the right reason. So far, with all of the time that we DO get to spend together, we have only had 3 fights – 2 were actually devastating to me and helped me look inward and learn about my struggles with need, want and intimacy.

SO, I guess MY answer to the question about my lover’s wife: I get JEALOUS as hell (and sad, too)! I feel that way because she has the most wonderful and loving man, right under her nose, and she treats him like garbage. It makes me so sad to think that, instead of being treated with the respect and adoration he deserves from his m***-f***ing LIFE PARTNER he has to return to sarcasm and double-entendres each time he returns home. She strikes me as a crabby, frustrated lady that only expects him to do things for her, not thankful at all for his everlasting patience or his light heart and spirit. She doesn’t even notice when he does something “special” for her. And maybe because I don’t get to be with him all the time, I appreciate him so much more…

I am sorry to my children that I have stayed in my loveless marriage. I worry every day: what kind of person are they going to choose to spend the rest of their life with? When they are 40 will they feel like they have completely been sucked dry by their spouse, too?


3 responses to “How do YOU feel when you see her?…

  1. […] How Do You Feel When You See Her?… […]

  2. The Hook says:

    I love your honesty, Smitten.
    You are a truly wonderfully human soul.

  3. Thank you. Being honest here has really helped me grow and learn more about some of my biggest “personality flaws”.

Talk to me :-)

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