Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

Festival of Feelings

on May 16, 2013

Craziness! It’s been a veritable festival of feelings for the last few days.

Thing #1 has matriculated.

While my in-laws were here my nephew(in-law)‘s partner (they weren’t married yet, but she was the mother of his two daughters) died in her sleep.

All of the parental units have gone far away back to home.

I spent the night with Loverman last night.

This morning Human Resources came to me with a letter from the IRS stating that they were about to start garnishing my wages (3 months ago I spoke with a Ms. Patalo who told me to stop making my monthly payments because my account was current — even though I had just received a statement showing that I still owed $1,500.00).

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Please forgive me, my thoughts are all over the place — at the same time I am trying to focus on sending as much light and love to my nephew as possible.

Thing #1’s graduation ceremony was Monday evening. It was lovely and awesome!

We got home late that night and emotions were running high because Thing #2 was starting to get jealous of all the attention her sister was getting. Also, Thing #1 didn’t appreciate the thoughtless gifts that Mr. Doom-n-Gloom had given her. Basically, everyone was tired from a long weekend and we all just needed some sleep and peace. At about midnight things seemed to settle down and we were able to lie down (except for Mr. Doom-n-Gloom. He got home from graduation and immediately went to bed).

Mr. Doom-n-Gloom got the phone call from his sister very early the next morning (Tuesday). When he told me the sad news it was 6AM and I was in the kitchen getting my lunch ready for work. He told me that our nephew Bobby woke up next to his partner, she was cold and he couldn’t wake her up. I instantly began to cry, thinking “How horrific!!!” and several different scenes played through in my head — none of them making me feel any better. My nephew is such a lovely young man and I keep thinking how difficult his life has been and how well he’s been doing and how happy he was with his life/daughters/girlfriend…

I had the awesome pleasure (sarcasm) of waking up both my girls to tell them that their favorite cousin’s girlfriend died in her sleep. They were both heartbroken; especially since we can’t go back to see them. I am hoping (barring the whole IRS thing) that I will be able to buy both of my girls plane tickets this summer and I can send them “home” to spend time with their cousins (most importantly Bobby and his daughters) and aunt and grandparents.

I don’t know yet how she died (because we are so far away from them and Mr. Gloom-n-Doom doesn’t communicate with me) but she either died from an allergic reaction to some antibiotics she was taking, or an aneurism (there was blood in her mouth). There was no sign that she was in pain; she didn’t reach out or anything before she passed… It looks like she died peacefully in her sleep. She was 19 years old. She just had their second baby 5 months ago. My sister-in-law told me that Bobby spent all day Wednesday playing on the floor with their oldest daughter (2.5 years) crying.

Her funeral is Monday.

The girls and I are devastated (it doesn’t appear to have affected Doom-n-Gloom)! It was so unexpected. She was such a lovely girl and mother.

At one point, Doom-n-Gloom told Thing #1 that he was sorry this happened on “her weekend.” She could only respond, “No, it’s Bobby’s weekend. He needs our love now” and then burst into tears…. I love that girl so much, she has such a big heart. Thing #2 seems to be taking it better, but she has a boyfriend to talk to and I wasn’t home last night. So tonight I will find out how my babies are doing.

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I was so thankful for Loverman on Tuesday morning! He met me for donuts on my way to work and I hugged the hell out of him! But all I kept thinking was, “What if that happened to one of us?”

A few years back, he had a very similar experience with me. I have a seizure disorder (not epilepsy because it didn’t develop until I was an adult) and one night when we spent the night together, while I was sleeping, I had a seizure. It wasn’t nearly as bad as most of my seizures have been, but (I knew exactly who he was when I woke up, I didn’t believe him at first — and then my tongue started swelling because I had bitten it so hard during the seizure. Most times I am very cloudy when I first come to — I can’t remember anything. It’s scary! Even when the memories start to come back… I couldn’t remember my street address for two years after my first seizure!) nevertheless, SUPER scary for him. He woke me up and told me what had happened. He looked so scared and worried! I recovered quickly, took some of my medicine and we did not have to go to the hospital <whew>.

twig page separatorThe rest of Tuesday happened. We went to dinner with Doom-n-Gloom’s parents because they were going home Wednesday morning. Dinner went well. We spend a good amount of time talking about Bobby’s girlfriend and her family and then we went home…

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But all this just goes to show that we are all mortal and anything could happen to any one of us at any time. Please, as a favor to me and especially my nephew, show all the people who you love just how very much you love them because they might not be around for you to show tomorrow.

One response to “Festival of Feelings

  1. Strange you should talk about seizures… anyway, lets hope we remain OK. Please take care of yourself as of course I have thought about this and would simply be inconsolably devastated.

Talk to me :-)

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