Tuesday afternoon, Doom-n-Gloom’s response was, “Whatever!” to my comment that Thing #1 and I would clean up after we made dinner. Maybe I am over-reacting, but I think I could actually hear his eyes rolling!
This was after a negative comment about how Thing #1 never cleans up after herself and how she is intentionally mean to him (wah! wah!). He said that she doesn’t eat his cooking because she wants to hurt his feelings — I know it’s really because it tastes like crap and that he intentionally makes things he knows she doesn’t like at least 3 days a week (he likes to throw himself in front of the bus all the time. He cooks food she doesn’t like and then complains to me that she won’t eat it. It’s stupid, but it helps him to stay miserable. Several times in the past I have told him he needs to stop making himself a martyr all the time. It doesn’t work). Also, if I am not coming home for dinner, he doesn’t make the kids any food! Yes, they are mostly-grown and self-sufficient, I just think it’s crappy that he only takes care of his kids when I’m around.
I’m not putting up with that shit any more!
I hung up on him and took the battery out of my phone.
That prick cares so little about me that he has absolutely NO idea what my work phone number is! And I am 99% sure he doesn’t even know the name of the company where I work (it would surprise the crap out of me if he knew! I don’t talk about it and he never asks…).
This is (pretty much) the same approach I took with my mother about 23 years ago when she kept calling me at 7 o’clock in the morning to ask me why I moved out (I worked in a restaurant and closed the place 5 nights a week. I usually got home around 4-5AM). She would ask the same exact question every single time, about twice a week, for approximately 5 months, before one day I simply told her, “I am going to hang up on you every time you ask me that question. I have answered it already and the answer will never change. Now, please let me get some sleep.” Then we would have an argument about why I can’t keep ‘normal people’ hours like her and dad.
I had to hang up on her 5 times before she got it. I will still do it when she says things that are inappropriate, but I have only done it 3 times since.
I have told Mr. Doom-n-Gloom dozens of times that if he doesn’t start trying to work things out with Thing #1, she’s going to move away and never talk to him again. He always turns it around and makes it her fault and says he will change when she does.