Conflicted

Conflicted

Make A Choice

Loverman has a weird pain in his leg for over a week now. When he describes it, it sounds like the symptoms I had when I had a blood clot in my left calf, but he won’t go to the doctor to get it checked out.

We just texted about it this morning.

Loverman Leg Pain

Last night he sat out from skating. I asked him to remember how he felt when he found out about my blood clot and what could have happened to me. He understood, but only a little because he still hasn’t made that doctor’s appointment. Even after I told him that I would help him pay for the appointment and go with him for moral support, he only told me that he would think about it.

On a conflicting note, two different guys have been bugging me to go out with them. Like, seriously. Both of them are very cute and very successful and they both have enough money to actually buy me things and take me places… They also take fairly good care of their bodies and totally look like it! One is the attorney-man, Brent, and the other is a gentleman that I met roller skating about 6 months ago. Last Saturday he told me that he really liked me and wanted to take me out to dinner.

Mr. Doom-n-Gloom is still not noticing anything about me. Ever. He only talks to me when he needs me to do something for him.

Neither my shitty husband, nor my incredible Loverman care enough about their bodies to take care of themselves. I hate watching them be miserable and in pain when I am constantly trying to help them get better.

I finally gave up on Mr. Doom-n-Gloom because he knows exactly what he needs to do/eat in regards to his chronic kidney disease/insanely high blood pressure; his doctor has given him written instructions on what to eat and exercises that he can do. I even found him a support group, but he refuses to join because they’re all probably too old and he wouldn’t like it. He simply refuses to do what he’s supposed to do to get/feel better! His kidneys are currently functioning at 42% and that’s good enough for him. He’s dreadfully overweight and refuses to exercise because it hurts too much (agreed, but I told him that he can start slow. Exercise hurt me, too, before I got fit! Also, cutting out the soda pop and kool-aid would really help him shed pounds fast! But he refuses to listen!) He takes his prescriptions and that’s about it.

high-low_bpConversely, Loverman has heart disease, high cholesterol and dangerously low blood pressure (except he doesn’t take any meds to maintain). Pounds are practically falling off of him because he only eats one meal a day — and it’s small and full of unhealthy-ness. He knows that he needs to eat fruits and veggies and healthy things (i.e. oatmeal) for his heart to work more easily, but he doesn’t think he will like the way it tastes so he turns up his nose at pretty much everything without even trying it. I am an AWESOME cook and I make awesomely healthy food: even Thing #1 will eat most everything I cook as long as it doesn’t have tomatoes or pickles (except pizza — pizza can have tomatoes), and she’s almost as picky as Loverman!

It’s so hard to watch someone you love let themselves waste away, knowing that they have the power to make it better.

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