One of the first two tasks given to me by Mr. X is to write a positive post about myself (the other is to let him know, every day before noon, that I am safe).
There are SO many things that I am proud of myself for! I guess I don’t sit down very often and quantify them.
While I’ve been growing, there have been times when I have wrongly given someone else credit for my own emotional advancement and I am so happy that I could see it (eventually) and give the credit back to myself.
When I *do* look at my accomplishments, I can’t believe how far I have brought myself since I moved to Colorado 7 years ago!
- I made the choice to go to the dentist and get my teeth fixed/pulled. That was one of THE hardest things I have ever done in my life because it really was the precipice of my “change”. It truly was like stepping off a cliff! It’s amazing how much having a beautiful smile to share with people has made a difference in me.
- I love myself. I didn’t used to. Maybe I don’t think I am gorgeous or anything, but that’s not important anyway. I am a really freaking cool person! So much so, that I actually look forward to time that I get to spend alone with myself.
- I never used to be able to go anywhere or try something new alone. It’s still a challenge for me now, but I can do it!
- I kicked meth abuse. All. By. Myself! (I had to move halfway across the country to do it, but I did it!)
- I have lost over 30 pounds and feel amazing about my body. The new self-confidence I feel from that is so empowering that I’m afraid I might accidentally use it for evil 😉
- I am a totally awesome jam skater! It took so much work for me to get here (and the broken ankle). Other ladies watch me and try to emulate me. I have been watching one woman for over a year and she has come so far — most of her “moves” are very similar to mine. One of my friends tells me she wishes that she could skate backwards as well as I do. Last week a man came up to me and asked me how I turn so smoothly. The feeling is flattering and amazing!
My biggest problem now is learning how to deal with this new self-esteem thing. Feeling good about myself still feels strange.
It’s something that will take time for me to get used to.
I think I’m doing okay, though. If I wasn’t, I would never have met Mr. X! 🙂