Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

Is My Only Answer Just To Give Up?

on February 4, 2015

Sometime Monday Loserman moved my truck. He didn’t tell me he did it. He didn’t post any updates on Facebook about it…

(wait a sec, let me just go check…)

Ok, so far nothing yet…

When I got home from work Monday night, Bear had been moved back to the original parking spot he had before he completely broke down (and had to be rolled to wherever he could fit).

I sent Loserman a text message that evening to thank him and wished him a good night.

No response….

Surprised?

You shouldn’t be.

I’m not

*smh*

While I was writing the other day’s post, I realized something:

As long as Loserman holds my truck ‘hostage’, he also holds me hostage.

As long as he continues to withhold information from me in regards to the repairs on MY beautiful Bear, he is still in control of me.

Almost every single day stupid Loserman passes through my thoughts and I feel so lost in what I should (or can) do.

Because he maintains total control of my truck parts and my repair manual and the time line, at this moment my hands are tied (and not in the fun way).

It would be easy enough for me to buy a new repair manual, but as for the parts, I NEED him. I don’t know what he has, what needs to be ordered, how long it will take…

I don’t know pretty much anything.

Because he is keeping me in the dark.

allow-continue-control

I can only ask him to give me my stuff back so I can (somehow) figure out what to do with my truck.

Without Loserman.

But, even if I ask him, he still maintains all control. He can decide not to give me back any of my stuff, even though I *wish* he would.

I want that more than anything at this point: just give me back my shit and be gone. I am completely “wore out” with these shenanigans.

*sigh*

My dream truck: the one we were going to rebuild, repair and repaint together…
He has steps and a push bar for Bear in his storage unit; we’ve been trying to agree on a color to paint him…

It’s so disheartening because there’s nothing I can do.

Absolutely nothing at all.

If I ask him for my things, he can still choose not to give them back to me.

How do I break the control?

Do I have to give up on my truck as completely hopeless and just move on?

Is that really the only way?

He already ran my heart through the wood-chipper, now he has to force me to give up my favorite thing, too?!?!?!

I really can’t do it.

I can’t give up my beautiful Bear…


4 responses to “Is My Only Answer Just To Give Up?

  1. beautifulmess7 says:

    I’m glad you’re seeing his tactics for what they are… He is being controlling and very manipulative. I think what you do is ask him for everything back, and tell him the slate is clean and he will owe you nothing if he’ll just clear out of your life. My guess is he will come running and bear will magically be repaired. Or he’ll throw a hissy fit and whine to Facebook about generic “unfair” things. Don’t expect him to ever take responsibility for his actions (or rather lack thereof). It may end up costing you more money, but the time, heartache, and general bullshit you have to deal with will go way down. It would all be worth it for me.

    • Just checked… Still no updates on Facebook. *phew* 😉
      I don’t expect anything of him any more, really. Everything you say is right, my dear. As always. Thank you hugs!
      For now I have talked to my apartment complex manager and told her about my “situation”. She made a note in my file and assured me that as long as I have a current lease and the vehicle’s tags are current (and the truck is registered to my apartment) there shouldn’t be a problem. Then she gave me the phone number & email of the towing company just in case.

      But I am not telling Loserman I did that. I still want him to think that this is something that has to get done right now! And I think I am still going to “freak out” on him regularly because he still isn’t communicating with me and I am kinda really miffed about that.

  2. augustmacgregor says:

    I don’t have any great advice to give, but I will say that I think beautifulmess7’s advice sounds good to me. You are right to not want to give up on Bear. I think that would make things worse if you did.

    • Thank you, Mr. MacGregor! 🙂 It would be so sad for me to lose my truck.
      As for the rest, I have worked it out so I have a little more time – at least until my lease expires in September. But I’m not telling Loserman that…
      XOX!

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