Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

“Emotional Intelligence”

on June 30, 2015


What Is Emotional Intelligence?

According to Psychology Today:
Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify and manage your own emotions and the emotions of others. It is generally said to include 3 skills:

1. Emotional awareness, including the ability to identify your own emotions and those of others;

2. The ability to harness emotions and apply them to tasks like thinking and problems solving;

3. The ability to manage emotions, including the ability to regulate your own emotions, and the ability to cheer up or calm down another person.

Why am I telling you this?

Because today, all the livelong day, I am at an Emotional Intelligence Training class in Boulder. Mandatory for work because the President of the company (not Boss-Lady) thought I was condescending to her when I was explaining company and legal accounting procedures over the telephone. *sigh*

Maybe you aren’t aware of this because, perhaps, you don’t have an accounting friend… But, accounting processes and procedures, both internal and legal, are as boring and uncomfortable to explain as it is to watch paint dry on a hot summer day in Atlanta with no shade! I don’t think there is an “emotionally intelligent” way to deliver that kind of information. Ever. On any day!

I try to be as “fun” with this shit as I can, but no matter how goddamn exciting you are, you just can’t make accounting entertaining or “emotionally fucking intelligent”.

To add insult to injury, my bitchy co-worker is literally feared by all the agents at our office AND myself. Her mood swings are epic! Yelling, door slams, tantrums, emotional bullying… You name it, she does it. On top of all that, she will condescend the fuck out of you! Any day. Any time. Any where. Not that it matters, but she’s 35 years old and she can act however she wants because Boss-Lady and her mother are BFFs. *smh*

And the following question keeps running through my brain:

Why doesn’t she have to take this fucking class, too???

(can we say “resentment”, children?)

Anyway… A few days ago, I was almost looking forward to going. As I was writing this post yesterday, I was truly dreading it and super fucking nervous!

Let me say that going skating somewhere new, by myself, is something that I was only recently able to “conquer”. And that’s in an environment where I’m comfortable with something!

I don’t like trying new things or going new places by myself. Key words here: by myself. I hate the anxiety and tension that I feel, and the harder I try to shove it down and ignore it and get past it, the more nervous and closed-off I become.

Pray tell how that is going to work out for an Emotional Intelligence class?

I don’t like meeting strangers and I definitely don’t like sitting in “breakout groups” for “getting to know each other” sessions or having little “re-enactments” or “trivia games”, etc, etc, etc… I think you understand what I am trying to say here…

On top of it, I won’t be able to communicate with TC almost all day long… (cry  me a river. I know…) Since we met almost 3 months ago, there have only been few days when we haven’t chatted or spoken. None since our weekend together last month.

Depending on how many “group sessions” we have (et al), I am seriously thinking about checking in and then not going. You know, pick up all the materials they give you at the beginning and then just get the hell out of dodge? I have also thought about bringing some marijuana edibles with to eat before the session and be high as a kite all day. The only person who would know is me…

I know it will be good for me. I know I will learn something. I know that if I practice meeting new people, going new places and seeing new things, it will all become easier in the long run. I know these things because they are all true.

So, why am I so scared?

4 responses to ““Emotional Intelligence”

  1. lolarocks says:

    Because you’re scared honey, you’re out of your comfort zone and you feel (rightly by the way) that you shouldn’t have do this shit. Unfortunately though your company are expecting it and you need to just do it.
    I know this isn’t easy as I share your feeling about the whole group sharing & team bonding thing. It is epically shit and I don’t envy you one bit. Go, turn up & engage. It’s the only way, otherwise your company will find out and the shit will hit the fan. You might actually enjoy it when you get there, you may make new friends, you may learn new coping techniques that help you, and if nothing else it’s gets you the hell out the office!!
    So in summary, suck it up cupcake!
    Pep talk over, let me know how you get on. Sending Internet hugs & a whole heap of positivity xx

    • XO!!! ❤
      Thanks, Lola!! Thank you for saying all of that – especially that you also can't stand team bonding shit. I know I have to go and buck it up and I know that I can learn something from it. Also, I need to remind myself that nothing is as bad as I think it's going to be.
      You always rock!!

  2. Anonymous says:

    I hope your class went well. You have to keep telling yourself that these experiences will make you better. I know you love to attempt to do everything at your highest standard. This is no different. Take what you can, along with your fear. Let everything come together to make you better.

    • Thank you!! You are right. Everything we do has the potential to make us better. It’s all in the way we choose to perceive it ❤
      The class itself was okay. I had an epiphany while I was taking a nap at lunchtime. After lunch it was less boring and I even made a new friend!


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