It Sucks I Have to Pretend You’re Dead



My divorce from Doom-n-Gloom is final.

According to the agreement, in order to avoid paying him support, he gets to live with me until our lease expires mid-September 2016.

But, I am single now and I could be yours if you would have me.

Being without you has totally sucked. It sucks every single fucking day!

Memories of you (and us) flooding through me at inopportune moments.

The spontaneous rush of tears I have to hold back until it’s convenient.

I heard about your attack at work.

Why didn’t you call?

Why don’t you call? Or email?

I’m sorry you were hurt and, with all of my heart, I hope that you are recovering well.

I wish I could have been there to help you like you helped me when I was broken.

Did you get any financial settlement? (If so, are you planning on paying me back the money you owe me? *sigh*)

Are you able to go back to work?

I really miss you…

Do you ever think about me?

Do you even remember?



4 thoughts on “It Sucks I Have to Pretend You’re Dead

    1. Thank you, Sweetheart ❤
      This is really so very mixed for me… I am not sure that I would have actually gotten my divorce if Loserman hadn't been the way he was.

  1. Congrats on your divorce! Though it sucks that he’s going to be living with you for another year. Hopefully he actually gets his lazy, worthless ass out when he’s supposed to.

    Also, I know it’s tempting, but idealizing someone who was really, really screwed up can mess with your head. There were good times, but there always are. Even with abusive fuckwads. Don’t let those cloud the truth of reality.

    1. Thank you so much for the kudos!

      As for the rest, I know you are right. But I don’t think I’m idealizing him – I am grieving the loss of a relationship that lasted 6 years of my life. Admittedly, it had very bad and unhealthy parts. Which is why I haven’t called him or gone back to him, nor do I ever intend to. It’s actually been almost two weeks since I checked up on his facebook page…

Talk to me :-)

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