Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

Craigslist Date #1

on March 1, 2016

So… I went on dates with two of the gentlemen that I weeded out from craigslist.

#1 was a total flop, but not until two days after our actual date.

I was going to call him Bruce because he looked so much like Bruce Campbell did 10 years ago (when BC was the same age as the man I went out with Tuesday night – except craigslist Bruce had a much weaker chin 😉 ). Our date seemed to go well. I liked him. I gave up my weekly gymnastics session to meet him. I even mentioned him in my pitiful post about Loserman’s birthday. He seemed nice at first, but they all seem that way at first, right?

Bruce is an over-the-road trucker right now. That being said, he’s working all day but he also has plenty of time to talk. Since we started corresponding last week, Bruce has been constantly texting and calling and wanting me to call him. A tiny bit needy, but I didn’t really let it bother me. I kind of thought it was flattering and that it would wear off in time.

While we were out, I asked him an important question – important because this issue caused a huge problem with Loserman towards the end:
All of my closest friends and the people that I spend the most time with are men. Do you think that will cause a problem?

Bruce told me that, as long as we continued to communicate and I continued to be present in his life and I didn’t spend all of my time with those guys, he would be okay with it.

That’s understandable. I feel the same way.

He also told me that it was totally okay if I dated other people because, right now, he’s always on the road and it’s difficult for him to make plans ahead of time.

We talked/texted a couple of times Wednesday before he had to go back to work.

Thursday afternoon he asked me to call him later in the evening. I explained that I wouldn’t be able to because I was “going out.” I didn’t want to be too specific with him, but I was going out with one of the other two men I met through craigslist.

Of course he asked what I was doing and who I was “going out” with. So, then I told him the rest of the story. Not too much, mind you, but I mentioned that it was another man who had replied to my craigslist post.

Bruce ended the call with, “Well, have a good time but I secretly hope that you don’t because I liked you. After that, I pretty much don’t know what to say.”

I thanked him and said that I understood his feelings and I hoped he had a good night. (this seems colder than my actual delivery to him – I tried to be very truthful but also gentle)

At 8:05 PM, while I was still on my date, I received the following text from Bruce:

I hope you are having a really crappy time. lol. I do like you!!

I didn’t see his message until I got home at 12:48AM. I figured it would be rude to text so late (even though his text was quite rude). So I decided to call him on my drive to work the next morning.

No need. It turns out that Bruce was a mother-fucking horsefly, too. (as if his previous message didn’t suggest as much)

He called while I was in the shower and I didn’t answer his call. After all, I was showering and I was still planning to call him on my drive to work…

When I didn’t answer, he seemingly assumed the worst. Instead of waiting for me to have time to respond to him and give him the time I felt he actually deserved, he reacted emotionally and irrationally and ended things with the following text:

Good morning Smitten, guess your night went well. I can’t win them all. LOL! You take care

Another one bites the dust, I guess.

I’m grateful he showed his intolerance right away.

5 responses to “Craigslist Date #1

  1. soddinl says:

    Wow. Gotta love the person who actually tells you to continue to date other people, then throws his toys out the pram when you actually do. It actually happened to me once. Apparently it was a ‘test’, that I ‘failed’, Pfffffft.

    • smitten says:

      After one freakin date, I would expect that dating other people would be okay. It’s not like he passed any type of test!!

      Thanks for your comment!!

  2. Confessions of Your Husband's Mistress says:

    You’re right, at least he showed it early and you can move on!

  3. Cheeky says:

    Euw. People who do the whole “lol *scathing remark” passive aggressive text creep me the fuck out. That right there is Jack in The Shining eg. Heeeere’s Johnny! After one date? Good for you dropping his ass, girlfriend. Sheesh. And um . . . honestly, this is going to sound horrible and backwards and in total betrayal of the feminist sisterhood (whatever that is), but if there is a guy who would be 100% okay with you spending time with other men, um, I’d honestly wonder if he had a pair. (yeah, i went there). I don’t know that men can fully commit to share their women on any level but then again, I don’t know much about men. . . Still putting out good energy for you and the search. 🙂

    • smitten says:

      I agree with what you’re saying about a guy and the 100%-okay thing. But I need to be up front so they don’t get all freaked out when I talk about hanging out with my friends, who are mostly guys. There is a married woman in our group, though. She said they had some arguments about it at the beginning, when she started skating with the group, but she still makes an effort to time for her husband, show him she loves him and they communicate about it (like grown people who love each other – fuck! I don’t know what that’s like *sigh* I can only fantasize. Haha!)

      Thank you for the positive vibes. XOX ❤

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