Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

You ok?

I went to bed at 6 PM on Wednesday night

To answer your question, I am sick.

I’ve been fighting ***serious*** depression and alcoholism for 5+ years. It’s not getting any better. It gets worse every week… Drinking a literal shit-ton and then passing out is my way of coping. (Example: Last night)

When I told you that I was trying to get my apartment ready for you, and then you told me that you would have to get a hotel or sleep in your car – It was like you didn’t read any of the words I sent. Did you even notice that I was trying? I bought a crate for my dog, put a privacy curtain up over my bedroom doorway and even explained to you that the kittens spend most of their time in Thing #1’s room…

Anyway:

Lovely Molly

I got Molly for me, so I could try and start healing myself. I’m so lost and alone… Molly has helped me lose over 20 pounds – and she gets me outside every single day. Maybe I’m not happy, maybe I haven’t stopped drinking, but she’s helping me. A lot! (Way a lot more than I have been able to help myself!)

I need to get better and I haven’t found a way yet. So far, Molly is the best way that I have found.

Finding the kittens just happened. They belong to Thing #1 🤷‍♀️

Kaska
Lyra

If my having these animals is a problem, please just say it outright. They help me. I am alone and I feel so alone.

Every. Damn. Day…

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Life Goals

I guess I’m supposed to have them, right?

Every time I set a life goal for myself, I rationalize myself out of it

Or I make it totally un-achievable or something

So then I can hate all over myself for failing

Or quitting

Read the rest of this entry »

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Monday Motivation: Practice Happiness

I was listening to the radio on my way home last Friday (the day doesn’t matter)… Michael Franti was here in Denver visiting one of the local stations before his concert.

The DJ asked him the coolest question, to which Michael Franti had a most amazing response.

The question was:

You are so positive all of the time. How do you stay so upbeat?

The response was:

Staying positive can be hard and it takes a lot of practice. It’s just like how you get good at anything. You have to practice. And eventually you will get better and better. Then being positive will be easy!

Lately all I have been able to see is the negative

I need more practice being positive

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Weekend CBD Skin Care Sale!!

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CBD Life

Are you sick and tired of being sick and tired?

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XOXO

CBD Health

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