The “Return” of Mr. Nice Guy

To be honest, like Alaska, he’s never really gone. He just lurks on the sidelines waiting for the perfect moment to reach out and let me know he’s still around.

Let us rewind for a moment:

Mr. Nice Guy and I used to work together – almost 5 years…

For a hot minute, in 2016, I thought we were going to be a “thing”, but it never really worked out or clicked or whatever. We had a few dates, each a little worse than the last

(the first one should have been an omen OMG!)

Whatever it was lasted a year.

Bloom and Grow

LEAVE ME ALONE!

Oh my fucking god!!

What does “never” mean to you?

Clearly not what it really means.

When I told you I never wanted to talk to you or hear from you again

I fucking meant NEVER

Don’t call me

Don’t text me

Sharing Is Caring

I’m back on Tinder again

It’s an on and off again relationship

Much like the one I had with Alaska

Anyway, here’s a rejection I’d like to share with you

This was after dude ignore me two times when I asked him if he wanted to go out…

“Omg! I don’t know how I missed that message.”

Twice.

Yeah, right.

 

Why I Stopped Writing

Shame is a powerful emotion

I dare say it’s as powerful an emotion as love

Both can be crippling

Accident Prone

What are these marks on your arms?

Burns.

There sure are a lot. How did they get there?

*smirk* It’s a bad habit… I always catch my arm on the rack or the top of the oven when I’m taking something out; even when I have a mitt on.

Are you doing it on purpose?

No.

I told you to stop hurting yourself.

Ummm… you told me to stop cutting myself. I am not cutting myself.

Cathartic Word Puke

I hope you are well.

Missing you at the moment because we spent so much sexy time together and I could use a little right now…. My weekends have been desolate now that you’re gone.

Anyway, I do not expect or hope that you will reply. This is purely an email I need to write for catharsis because my Daddy is gone and I don’t have someone to talk to…

I quit my “real” job… My last day was yesterday. It feels good because, as you may remember, I felt that they were bullying me. Well, it turns out that they got stuff done by being mean – not something I like. I am less scared than I thought which is surprising as everything scares me any more. And now I am finding that I need validation – someone to tell me I did the right thing…

Good night, Mr. Mentor. I am grateful to you for the tools that you have given me. Be well, warm and safe. I hope you’ve found someone who makes you happier than I ever could. Your happiness is important to me.

Sincerely,
Fish

Slay the Dragon!

It’s okay to miss him

It’s not okay to take him back

Friday Ear Worm: Wild Horses

I’m not a big Rolling Stones fan, but this song got stuck in my head while I was writing yesterday’s post…

My Psychotic Break (Part 2)

To read Part 1, click HERE

After all that bullshit, we didn’t have another interaction for 6 days.

And it’s the 5th week of barely any contact…

On that Friday afternoon, he sent me a text. “You won’t believe it, but I hyperextended my knee playing basketball last night.”

He was right. I didn’t believe it…

“Oh, that’s terrible,” I answered.

There were a few more trite comments where I tried to be nice and pretend like I gave a shit.

Then our chat was over.