Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

A Meeting With Mr. X

Photo Credit: lanier67

Photo Credit: lanier67

Mr. X and I met briefly last week after a brief and uncomfortable text conversation. I was going to share it with you here, but it’s longer than I remembered it to be.

In short, we decided to meet so we could hash a few issues out face-to-face.

I was nervous because of some things I said to him before he left town on some family business.

We talked about our situation and how it needs to work for both of us. (I have to admit that I am really starting to like this “open communication” and honesty thing. Especially when my ‘partner’ doesn’t hate me for sharing my feelings…)

  • He agreed only to tell me about future “plans” or fun things we’re going to do if he’s at least 75% sure it’s going to happen (or 80%, I can’t remember…). Anything less than that and he has to keep it to himself so I don’t get my hopes up 😉
  • I agreed that I need to back off. I need to practice patience. He totally spoiled me at the beginning with attention (not a complaint, just an observation) and I got used to it. In fact I loved it, even though I knew that it couldn’t possibly be that way all the time.

It’s surprising how attached I have become to him in such a short time. We’ve only ‘known’ each other since the end of November, but he already knows so much about me.

Even more than Loserman did.

And Mr. X still likes me…



So, a couple of hours after I published my last post, where I said

“…If he wants to talk to me, he can reach out to me.

I don’t feel like chasing him down this time.”

I posted this on Facebook:

She will chase you

Loverman called me 10 minutes after that went up! No shit! He told me that his smart phone has been “acting-a-nut” the last couple of days (his new phone IS fucked up all the time) and he hasn’t gotten any of my texts, he can’t check his email and he can’t get on the internet. He said that he was calling me to make sure that I didn’t freak out like last time.

Coincidence? Or did he see my status and think about it for 10 minutes? Either way, I think the effort was sweet.

Maybe I really am a dumbass, but I think it was actually a sincere coincidence. We had a decent conversation – I was quite irritated at the beginning, but I chilled.

I do want to tell you that I am still backing off a bit from Loverman. Things are not all better. We have not kissed and made up.

I still went on my date with Mr. AM last night.

Stay tuned for the fun details!


Broken Silence

Loverman: You at home?

Me: Yes

Loverman: Can I drop your oil pan off?

Me: Sure

Loverman: I’m here


And that is how he broke the silence.

I went outside to unlock my truck for him.

Pretending to smile as I walked.

Sometimes, if I pretend to be happy I actually become happy.

That didn’t happen this time, but I didn’t get sadder.

I told him again that it really hurts my feelings when he ignores me.

He responded with a blank look and, “What do you mean?”

Really?!?! Are you for real?

I said, Usually we talk every day and you kind of just dropped off my radar.

“I’ve been really busy working on this dude’s car and getting some stuff accomplished.”

(I hate when you say that shit: getting some stuff accomplished…

WTF? You still have my car in your garage waiting for you to drop the engine into it!

When will you be accomplishing that stuff?)

It’s time for a break. I am glad we are having one.

There’s too much anger filling me up inside and I don’t know if it’s me or PMS.

It’s still to hard to choose nice words.

We talked for a while longer.

I told him I was skating tomorrow and if he wanted to come with he needed to let me know.

I told him that I wanted to back off from and not bother him so much to do stuff with me.

I am always the one who asks if we can do something and I am sick of it

I wasn’t going to bother him about it again, I said. So, if you want to come you have to tell me.

I’m going skating either way, I told him.

“Yeah. I’m taking it day-by-day right now.”


I replied, I understand. You’re worried about losing your car.

There were other words. Small talk.

It felt awkward to me.

I don’t know how it felt for him.

He gave me a hug before he left and I went back upstairs to get comfortable and ready for bed.