Popcorn Saved My Life

A little over a week ago, while I was driving to my aesthetician for my monthly mons pubis mingis removis, some crazy woman pulled directly in front of me while I was going about 20 miles per hour.

I had to slam on the brakes and crank the steering wheel far to the right in order to avoid hitting her. Breezy lurched up and over the curb and I am surprised as hell that we didn’t run that fucking bitch over!!

Err, that being said, it was unnerving (to say the least) and I was glad that the light was red so I could sit and breathe and recover.

Moving

(I haven’t been feeling very up to writing lately, but this has been sitting unfinished in my drafts folder for far too long.)

This is NOT all our stuff!

The weekend before Thing #1 and I moved was absolute craziness.

Doom-n-Gloom and Thing #2 were planning on being out of the old apartment by Sunday evening.

Long story short: they weren’t. When the day was over, they hadn’t even moved half of their things. The rest for us to ‘deal with’ until their return Monday evening.

Killing Me Softly

Friday evening, when I got home from work, I was happy that the parking spot next to Breezy was open. I put Lil Bear in his place, grabbed my things and went inside to make dinner.

A friend was coming over at 7pm to eat with us and then give us massages. Because he hadn’t yet been to my new apartment (which I haven’t even told you about yet!), I met him out in the parking lot. I leaned on Lil Bear while I waited for our friend’s arrival.

We ate yummy food together; had our massages… It was a lovely evening.

When our friend left at 10:30, I walked him out and Lil Bear was still in his spot.

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Car Stress

Mick has really been quite a hero the past couple of weeks.

My roller skates broke and he fixed my old pair for me so I could skate while I was waiting for my replacements to arrive.

Since then, my replacements have arrived and been customized to my standards 😉 and I think I actually like the old ones better now… but that’s another story… back to the hero part…

Breezy has needed front wheel bearings for quite some time. I purchased the parts and Mick did the work. We spent the Sunday afternoon together. First I had some things I needed to get off my chest but after that it was him working and me asking questions. Car fixing fun!! Soon we’ll be fixing the rest of Breezy’s littler issues. It’s such a relief!

My “New” Car

I’ve decided to name him “Lil Bear”. (I miss my big Bear SO MUCH!)

It took 4 weeks to figure it out, but that’s what I decided.

He’s a little ’99 Subaru Legend GT Sedan with 150,000 miles, rebuilt from salvage.

I got a great deal!!

One of my dearest friends helped me until I found the perfect car.

There’s even a Minnesota bumper sticker on the back! When I saw that, I was sure Lil Bear was meant to be mine.

Things…

Quite a few times now I have sat down to write all of the things that are happening to me… All the feelings that are going on inside of me…

The words just don’t flow. I feel like I am staggering drunkenly across the page each time I scrawl something new (and that’s a challenge because I’m typing. hehehe…).

Fake

I’m surrounded by it!

Fake hair
Fake nails
Fake skin
Fake personalities…

And it’s all about money, money money!!!

Maybe if I had enough, I might be like all of them.

***OR***

I might choose to fucking share it or use it differently than on sheer vanity. But, I work with real estate agents, bankers and title companies. Apparently, to be employed or work in these fields, you must be 100% not real in any way at all.

It’s the status quo to drive a BMW or Audi or Range Rover or Mercedes and own your own, expensive home in a pretentiously glamorous neighborhood. I drive a piece of shit (no offense, Breezy), rusty, old 1997 Plymouth Breeze with almost 200,000 miles and I rent a fucking 2 -bedroom apartment with a loft.

• I don’t wear makeup, pretty much ever. There will be a special occasion now and again, but it’s a pain in the ass to put on, it gets on my clothes and clogs my already-oil-saturated face pores.
• My hair is very, very grey – I figure why the hell should I even try? It would cost thousand$ to continually cover up what is fighting naturally to be there!
• I can’t remember the last time I paid full price for an item of clothing: thrift stores are where it’s at!

Johnny Id posted this picture Wednesday as I was writing this… It made me laugh so hard because it fit so well with my feelings 🙂 Thanks, J-Man ❤

from EvilMilk

Ahhh, FetLife

I have ‘met’ a few men through FetLife (here’s a post about one of them), but I’ve only met two in person.

The first man was back at the end of April, right before TC flew out to meet me in May. He was my age. We got together twice, but I didn’t like him so much. Once he told me he was married, that was the end. He wanted to continue things, but I explained to him I no longer wanted to be the “other woman” (that and the fact that I didn’t really like his whiny ass very much).

My Necklace

At long last, I received my necklace back from TC. Thank you, TC.

Is it a coincidence that it arrived on my birthday or do you think he planned it that way?

As you can see, it’s nothing much. It isn’t made of gold or silver or platinum and it doesn’t have any precious stones set into it.

It’s just a plain, ordinary necklace that I made for myself, then decided to hang in my wonderful truck, Bear. It hung there the entire time I had him (6 years).

When I had to get rid of Bear, I thought about moving it to my car, Breezy, but I wasn’t ready to see it hanging in front of my face every day: morning and night, reminding me of painful things too close to my heart. Instead I decided to give it to TC as a special “piece of me” that he would be able to keep close to him when I was far away.

Now that I have it back, I really don’t know what to do with it.

Now, it has even more negative energy and memories attached to it, and it used to be such a beautiful piece of myself.

Part of the band was mashed in a post office machine during the process of being mailed back and a few of the beads were disintegrated.

Maybe I can rebuild it and it will become more beautiful than before…