This guy won’t let go, and the funniest thing about it is: he has already said “Good-bye” to me.
At the beginning of our conversations, he told me that instead of saying “Good-bye” when someone leaves or a talk ends, he always says “Peace” to them instead.
True to that, whenever we talked on the phone, he always ended our talks with “Peace”.
He explained to me that “Good-bye” was too final; that he only says “Good-bye” to people who have died, or he is severing his ties with them.
He said “Good-bye” to me when I ended things with him New Years Eve.
But then, after his “Good-bye“, he texted me some psycho-manipulative bullshit while I was on my skate trip to Houston.
At which point he told me he wouldn’t “bother” me again.
Usually, when The Universe communicates with me it’s quite obvious.
Sometimes I listen.
Most times I don’t 😦
I’ve ignored the signs enough that, now, I don’t even know if I can recognize them.
Also, my life has been rather chaotic since I ended things with Jim/”Mick”
Technically, this is Conversation #2. A while back I wrote briefly about Big Daddy. Very briefly…
Since that time we have been chatting via text (until recently) and (rarely) talking on the phone, but I haven’t been taking it seriously. I guess, in that respect, I am just as much a catfish as I am assuming he is.
He lives in Colorado Springs, a little over an hour away. Since we started “talking” in August, he has made plans to visit me in Denver 3 times and has had to cancel each time at the very last minute. Maybe he really does have issues with his mother and a ton of family drama with his brother. Or maybe, he’s a fake and pretending and lying…
If it matters, I met Big Daddy through collarspace. He had seen the pictures posted on there before we even started talking.
All of the time I suspect that things are not what they seem…
…everything has a different meaning…
No one truly means what they’re saying… (I’m getting much better at this one)
Part of that is conditioning I received from my parents (mostly father). And, although I am not blaming them, I have a really tough time changing those conditioned parts of myself.
I have a feeling that some of you are going to scold me for what I am about to say, but here goes anyway.
Now that I have my awesome smart phone, I opened a profile on Tinder. Don’t worry though, nothing has really happened yet.
I find it quite amusing.
And equally frustrating.
(get ready, this is gonna be a long one *smh* but also possibly very entertaining…)
I started a profile on FetLife a couple of months ago, but I haven’t done anything with it until recently. It probably has something to do with the fact that my first contact came on the first day and he was a total jerk that wanted to Top me immediately and get me into the group thing (and not the “munch” kind of group). He wasn’t even remotely polite about it either.
My profile blatantly states that I am totally new at this D/s & BDSM thing.
I told him that I was more interested in exploring things before I get into a full-blown orgy (although I might not be opposed to one at some point… I don’t know…) and that was the end of the conversation.
Well, last week when I ventured out again, I ‘met’ a nice man from Maine. He’s been spending time getting to know me. In fact, my recent venture into kinky erotica was first written in email-form to him. Not once has he asked me to call him Sir. We are just having respectful (and sometimes erotic and kinky) chat.