Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

People Change

There are a couple of posts from over a year ago – namely this one – that paint Alaska in a bad light… “we” were new and I was scared/timid and not able to communicate my feelings to him. So I communicated them here… It’s still scary for me to go back and read some of those words because it’s truly how I felt.

But, as our “old” relationship evolved, I got better at communicating with him…

As a matter of fact, I “broke up” with him on New Year’s Eve (2015) because I had expressed my feelings to him and he chose to ignore them.

AND, even after that, as we re-continued things, I was able to articulate all my feelings to him when the whole Amanda incident happened…

When I read that post now it still hurts, but I wonder if maybe Alaska was just as shocked about things as I was… I mean, we did just finish a whole orgasmic mutual masturbation thing… 😉 and were in our post-coital cuddling place… naked… and he made love to me three times after that…

 …and he with me (even though his communication is more non-verbal) – The Morning After

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Someone

It’s possible he won’t like that “Someone” is the name I chose for him…

We’ve been conversating through my blog for quite some time; it was right before my skate trip to Dallas when we exchanged numbers.

He came to my hotel one evening while I was there and we met in the lobby.

We chatted for an hour or so. I enjoyed his company, he was handsome, gentlemanly, very intelligent…

I actually wondered why he didn’t try to kiss me, but I figured it was meant to be a platonic friendship and that was totally alright with me!

Sex messes things up for me anyway, and my 21-year-old daughter was sleeping up in our room… There wasn’t much we could have done.

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Manipulation or Loneliness?

trulymeantforyou

Even though I ended things with him, my Catfish reached out to me while I was on vacation in Houston with my Sk8 Crew.

This was our little chat.

skatesemail_catfish

“An email on your skates”… Huh?

“I won’t bug you anymore”…

???

I intentionally didn’t respond because I didn’t want to play along. I was on my fucking vacation hanging out with my friends!!

And I broke up with him!

It feels like manipulation to me, but he could just be lonely…

And I can be a bit of a hardass…

What do you think?

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That Was Quite a Bomb Yesterday

Previous post here

NeuroticPsychotic

Yeah, I knew exactly what he meant when he said that shit.

But I feigned naïveté because (maybe?) I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt… I don’t know. At this point I think I’m just a glutton for punishment and incredibly silly for not ending all communication with him.

Bomb1
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All This Chickening Out is Making Me Gun-Shy

So…

I have a feeling that some of you are going to scold me for what I am about to say, but here goes anyway.

Now that I have my awesome smart phone, I opened a profile on Tinder. Don’t worry though, nothing has really happened yet.

I find it quite amusing.

And equally frustrating.

kermit

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Quiet

I am thankful to say that the reason I haven’t been writing is because I have nothing really to write about. Things are mostly quiet in my life.

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Underwear

things

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Oops! I did it again…

It turns out I like this being-passive-aggressive-thing when dealing with Loserman

Loserman did NOT work on my truck, Bear, last weekend like he promised (but he did manage to move it to the other side of the parking lot – something he’s also supposed to be doing).

So, I called him Monday morning while I was driving to work.

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How Mr. Mystery Ended It

I am a little perturbed that you didn’t tell me you were in an exclusive relationship

Until I started getting attached and having hope

I know you have no control over when and how I feel things, but you should know

that i am having them and feeling them

Hmmm. Yes I see the problem. I probably could have handled it better

Or maybe *I* should have. I am very naive

when it comes to men

And this “exclusivity” is also rather recent

It’s really none of my business
If it was, I think you may have already told me

I’m sorry this has hurt you. We best nip things in the bud so we can hopefully not create any more

Sure, … … …
I trust you.
I am sorry

It is I who am, sorry. I will delete everything right now

Simple line divider

That is the end and the last I have heard from him.

“I probably could have handled it better…”

Yeah? No shit, Sherlock!

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