Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes


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Sex Is Brainier for Women

I haven’t mentioned it yet here, but I have been doing a considerable amount of “romping around” over the past few weeks. The only time I’ve mentioned it here was to vent about being frustrated that guys are wimpy and flaky and they can’t handle me.

Well, Mitch and Azi are back (Mitch was never really out of the picture, I just haven’t been writing about him – I will very soon, I promise).

And there is a new guy I met on Tinder: Alaska. I will tell you more about him next week… 😉 Read the rest of this entry »


What’s Your Sign?

Yesterday’s Daily Prompt asked:

Litmus, Litmus on the Wall

If you had to come up with one question, the answer to which would determine whether or not you could be friends with a person you’ve just met, what would it be? What would the right answer be?

Of course there are the standard questions that help me get an idea of an unknown person:

  • What’s your favorite music to listen to?
  • What kind of car do you drive?
  • Do you have any kids?
  • Are you from here originally?
  • What do you do for a living?

But, if I had to rely on only one single question to determine whether or not I can be friends with someone, it would be:

What’s your sign?

Cancer is definitely the wrong answer. I am completely and utterly INcompatible with Cancers. Potential suitors have been turned away because they told me that was their zodiac sign.

What’s funny is, I checked the compatibility of Cancer and Virgo. Supposedly:cancer zodiac tattoo

“The Homemaker and the Healer share a nurturing side to their personalities. For Cancer, it’s all about taking care of loved ones in an emotional sense. For Virgo, it’s more about serving others and healing them on a practical level, but again, these different approaches complement one another rather than provoking conflict. When it comes to courtship, there are few signs more old-fashioned than Virgo – and Cancer compatibility increases when a courtship is slow, dignified and sincere. Although both partners can be slightly shy in their day-to-day lives, they feel relaxed enough with one another to show their true selves, which is when love can begin to blossom. For Cancer and Virgo, compatibility thrives on the knowledge that they can trust each other.” (credit:

Hmmmm…. Cancers are too volatile and moody for me (I mean absolutely NO offense to my readers who happen to be Cancers!), especially around full-moon-time. And I do not feel relaxed or comfortable around them. I am constantly guarding myself and worrying about what passive-aggressive way they will communicate their issues to me. I don’t do passive-aggressive!

Doom-n-Gloom is a Cancer and I have had other past relationships with Cancers (friendly and romantic). Not a single one of them was like the description above! Trust was always a huge issue — we were (are) constantly guarding ourselves from each other, never letting the true feelings out.

The correct answer would be:


“The important thing is that next to a Virgo just like yourself you will never get bored or feel betrayed. Your Virgo is as faithful as you are and you think alike. You are as idealistic as one can be but, at the same time, you both have enough realism and practical sense to realize what can and cannot be changed about the other.

Finally, you have a partner that doesn’t complain about your staying too much at work, because that’s where your Virgo spends his/her time, too. That’s a little too much, indeed.” (credit:

When I meet a Virgo, I know instantly. There is a chemistry and repor that I feel deep inside my soul and conversation flows from the moment of first contact.

Pisces is a close second.pisces-symbol-pictures

“…both signs are mutable, flexible and adaptable – once they understand what is required of them, both partners are perfectly capable of supporting each other with overwhelming each other. It’s a delicate balance, but for Virgo and Pisces, compatibility is worth the effort.

At its best, this relationship can be magical, entrancing and deeply romantic. Communication is the absolute key, and each partner must be honest about their feelings without trying to hide the worst. Usually, when the Dreamer and the Healer join forces, they can create a better world both for themselves and for the rest of us.” (credit:

Both my daughter and a very dear old FWB of mine are Gemini. We are muy simpatico!Wonderful Black Ink Tribal Gemini Tattoo Design

“Virgo and Gemini do well together in the area of friendship and dating. They both will have plenty to talk about, and will admire the other’s intelligence. Virgo will be piqued and charmed by Gemini’s knowledge of many things, bright outlook on life and witty humor. Gemini will be intrigued with Virgo’s stability, calm personality and matter-of-fact attitude. Gemini will have to understand that Virgo doesn’t necessarily care for the glittering nightlife, while Virgo will make things easier by not keeping Gemini inside the house all day. Both signs are mutable, so compromise shouldn’t be difficult (unless either native has many fixed planets in their birth chart). ”  (credit:


Word of the Day: Catalyst




  1. Chemistry . a substance that causes or accelerates a chemical reaction without itself being affected.
  2. Something that causes activity between two or more persons or forces without itself being affected.
  3. A person or thing that precipitates an event or change
  4. A person whose talk, enthusiasm, or energy causes others to be more friendly, enthusiastic, or energetic.

Word Origin & History

catalyst – 1902, formed in Eng. (on analogy of analyst) from Gk. kata “down” + -lysis “a loosening” (comb. form).


Loverman has been a great catalyst for me (see definition #3 above). I know that we have rough times and I complain about feeling alone and abandoned by him, but also I know that we have a “special” relationship. One that requires more patience and understanding. One where I have to understand that, even though it seems like I am always “coming in last”, really Loverman is “saving the best for last” (and I AM the best!!)!

I have confusing emotions tearing through my insides when it comes to my relationship with Loverman — emotions that I cannot explain or justify, they’re just there and I have to learn to process them. I have to learn to rationalize my fears and frustrations and communicate them to my most intimate friend. I have to trust that telling him my scariest, most overwhelming feelings will also act as a catalyst in our relationship. It might help him be able to express his most scariest and overwhelming feelings to me, too.

My move to Colorado was a catalyst (see definition #2 — although I think we may have actually “affected” the state of Colorado 😉 ) Coming here was the catalyst that brought Loverman and I together and, for that, I will be forever grateful! (He moved here, too, about 7 years before me.)

Both meeting Loverman and moving to Denver, are the catalysts that helped me break out of my invisible shell (I say “invisible” because I didn’t know it was there). I have learned that I love myself very much. I also learned that wasn’t truly myself before. I used to worry so much about whether my parents thought I was doing the right thing, or if it was something Mr. Doom-n-Gloom would like.

Now, I worry about what *I* like and what *I* think about myself because eventually I realized that it isn’t what I have on the outside or what other people think of me that makes me wonderful, it’s what I have on the inside — and I love my inside! Finally!

Has there been a catalyst in your life? Do you need one?

Carla Higgs and the Bosons presents: Catalyst by anqila

Carla Higgs and the Bosons presents: Catalyst
by anqila


Smitten’s Sunday Science: Hangovers

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

With that, please be safe and careful. And don’t forget that it’s Monday tomorrow 😉

Happy St Patricks Day


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