So, what happens is:

I spend my entire week (through thoughts of suicide and self-destruction) trying to build myself up and tell myself that I am amazing and smart and worth it – basically, trying to love myself…

(Trust me, it’s not easy fighting the thoughts that I am insane and shit. You *totally* don’t help me. Check it out):

The “Return” of Mr. Nice Guy

To be honest, like Alaska, he’s never really gone. He just lurks on the sidelines waiting for the perfect moment to reach out and let me know he’s still around.

Let us rewind for a moment:

Mr. Nice Guy and I used to work together – almost 5 years…

For a hot minute, in 2016, I thought we were going to be a “thing”, but it never really worked out or clicked or whatever. We had a few dates, each a little worse than the last

(the first one should have been an omen OMG!)

Whatever it was lasted a year.

Sharing Is Caring

I’m back on Tinder again

It’s an on and off again relationship

Much like the one I had with Alaska

Anyway, here’s a rejection I’d like to share with you

This was after dude ignore me two times when I asked him if he wanted to go out…

“Omg! I don’t know how I missed that message.”

Twice.

Yeah, right.

 

Another One Bites the Dust?

I wanted to like this guy, too.

I wanted to figure out a name for him and tell you about him here.

Maybe I was too hard on him. He seemed genuinely sorry.

I did keep his number…

Why We Choose Difficult Partners

“We probably can’t change our templates of attraction”, but we CAN change how we respond to trigger behaviors.

Leaving Alaska (Finally!)

Mid-December I broke up with Alaska via video:

It lasted all of 2 weeks

I took him back because he agreed with what I said

And told me he would start trying harder

7 Ways to Tell You’re Just a Booty Call (and/or that Your S.O. has Probably Moved On)

1. He/She doesn’t show any interest in any of the things that interest you
2. He/She doesn’t buy you gifts “just because”, or for holidays, or ever…
3. He/She doesn’t take you anywhere and always says “No” when you ask them to do something with you (outside of the bedroom)
4. He/She stops inviting you over to his/her house
5. He/She forgets your birthday, even after being reminded it’s coming up
6. He/She only hears what he/she wants you to want, not what you actually want
7. He/She can only find 3-4 hours a week to spend time with you – sequestered alone in your bedroom, working at least 50% of the time and ‘letting’ you please him/her the rest of the time

Don’t find out the hard way 😦

No More Mr. Nice Guy

After almost a year of “dating” once a month or so still no sex.

No hope for it either, really. He was happy rubbing on my nyloned legs and taking pictures of them in heels and hose, but was also happy enough just to go home and whack the sausage alone after it was all said and done. One time he even mentioned how strange he thought it was that he never felt comfortable kissing me.

So there wasn’t any kissing either…

Rock Star Returns. Kind of…

Back in January, I was contacted by a young man on FetLife.

I named him Rock Star.

He was 26.

(Read the entire story [here])

Short version:

We agreed to meet one night at a rather busy bar, had a couple of drinks and got along very well.

So well that we had a “practice run” in the front seat of my “new” car (at the time), Lil Bear.

Then, the following weekend, during a legitimate hookup at a local Motel 6, he professed his undying love for some other woman he had never met…

Mr. Player

(Nice kitty!)

I was having a “lovely” conversation with a fella on Tinder (because I caved and signed back up *sigh*).

He seemed decent enough. Usually I swipe left on guys without a picture, but this guy had made an effort to write a profile and put his height in it, the words were spelled correctly, AND he made a challenge about having fun!

I figured, what the hell? If I don’t like him, I don’t have to keep talking to him.

As luck would have it, I did enjoy talking to him and, before taking things any further I wanted to see a picture of him.

So we exchanged numbers.