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7 Ways to Tell You’re Just a Booty Call (and/or that Your S.O. has Probably Moved On)

  1. He/She doesn’t show any interest in any of the things that interest you
  2. He/She doesn’t buy you gifts “just because”, or for holidays, or ever
  3. He/She doesn’t take you anywhere and always says “No” when you ask them to do something with you (outside of the bedroom)
  4. He/She stops inviting you over to his/her house
  5. He/She forgets your birthday, even after being reminded it’s coming up
  6. He/She only hears what he/she wants you to want, not what you actually want
  7. He/She can only find 3-4 hours a week to spend time with you – sequestered alone in your bedroom, working at least 50% of the time and ‘letting’ you please him/her the rest of the time

Don’t find out the hard way 😦

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No More Mr. Nice Guy

nomoremrniceguy

After almost a year of “dating” once a month or so still no sex.

No hope for it either, really. He was happy rubbing on my nyloned legs and taking pictures of them in heels and hose, but was also happy enough just to go home and whack the sausage alone after it was all said and done. One time he even mentioned how strange he thought it was that he never felt comfortable kissing me.

So there wasn’t any kissing either…

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Rock Star Returns. Kind of…

Rock Star Returns. Kind of…

Back in January, I was contacted by a young man on FetLife.

I named him Rock Star.

He was 26.

(Read the entire story [here])

Short version:

We agreed to meet one night at a rather busy bar, had a couple of drinks and got along very well.

So well that we had a “practice run” in the front seat of my “new” car (at the time), Lil Bear.

Then, the following weekend, during a legitimate hookup at a local Motel 6, he professed his undying love for some other woman he had never met…

jerk-store

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Mr. Player

Mr. Player

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(Nice kitty!)

I was having a “lovely” conversation with a fella on Tinder (because I caved and signed back up *sigh*).

He seemed decent enough. Usually I swipe left on guys without a picture, but this guy had made an effort to write a profile and put his height in it, the words were spelled correctly, AND he made a challenge about having fun!

I figured, what the hell? If I don’t like him, I don’t have to keep talking to him.

As luck would have it, I did enjoy talking to him and, before taking things any further I wanted to see a picture of him.

So we exchanged numbers.

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Not Interested

Not Interested

Image result for she's not into you

My very first, hard and fast, rule is: don’t skate and date.

After breaking up with someone you’ve skated with and been intimate with, things get awkward.

The skate rinks are like the children; time with each needs to be doled out carefully and fairly.

When can I go to that one? When are you going to this one?

And, if it was a bad breakup, there’s no discussion about any of that

Awkward…

It really only had to happen to me once for me to learn.

(I dabbled once more after that, but he moved to Phoenix, and it wasn’t serious.)

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A Flake of Tinder

A Flake of Tinder

DatingIsHard

This guy seemed decent. He seemed intelligent, honest, fun, active… His photos appeared to be current and, if they were of him, he was attractive.

I swiped the match on a Sunday evening. He was out of town, but responded within a reasonable time that he was driving back into Denver early Monday morning, could I contact him sometime later that day?

Sure. No problem.

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Craigslist Date #1

Craigslist Date #1

So… I went on dates with two of the gentlemen that I weeded out from craigslist.

#1 was a total flop, but not until two days after our actual date.

I was going to call him Bruce because he looked so much like Bruce Campbell did 10 years ago (when BC was the same age as the man I went out with Tuesday night – except craigslist Bruce had a much weaker chin 😉 ). Our date seemed to go well. I liked him. I gave up my weekly gymnastics session to meet him. I even mentioned him in my pitiful post about Loserman’s birthday. He seemed nice at first, but they all seem that way at first, right?

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My Grandiloquent Craig’s List Experience (aka: get ready, this is gonna be a long one)

My Grandiloquent Craig’s List Experience (aka: get ready, this is gonna be a long one)

grandiloquent

Last week I thought I would try something new and check out Craig’s List. It was interesting and seemingly more honest than any of the actual dating websites that I have been trying. (Don’t bother with Zoosk. You have to pay for everything.)

I was going to show you part of his original posting here, but it looks like he’s taken it down. Let me just say that it was quite loquacious and leave it at that.

I will be referring to him here as Shakespeare.

Very shortly you will see what I mean and why.

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