(I haven’t been feeling very up to writing lately, but this has been sitting unfinished in my drafts folder for far too long.)
This is NOT all our stuff!
The weekend before Thing #1 and I moved was absolute craziness.
Doom-n-Gloom and Thing #2 were planning on being out of the old apartment by Sunday evening.
Long story short: they weren’t. When the day was over, they hadn’t even moved half of their things. The rest for us to ‘deal with’ until their return Monday evening.
Friday evening, when I got home from work, I was happy that the parking spot next to Breezy was open. I put Lil Bear in his place, grabbed my things and went inside to make dinner.
A friend was coming over at 7pm to eat with us and then give us massages. Because he hadn’t yet been to my new apartment (which I haven’t even told you about yet!), I met him out in the parking lot. I leaned on Lil Bear while I waited for our friend’s arrival.
We ate yummy food together; had our massages… It was a lovely evening.
When our friend left at 10:30, I walked him out and Lil Bear was still in his spot.
In a little less than 3 weeks, Thing #1 and I will be moving to a new apartment across town.
Finally, after a year of being divorced, Doom-n-Gloom will no longer be living in my apartment.
I’m super duper excited!!!
However, Thing #2 is kind of creating issues.
She has decided she would like to continue living with her father.
from Pinterest
For the time being, my life is in a quiet, restful place.
Like the calm before the storm.
One thing I noticed recently about my relationship with Mick is I don’t feel a compulsive need to be having sex with him all of the time we are together. In fact, my actual sexual libido is almost non-existent. I’m rarely horny any more. That could be because (when we’re together) he is touching me almost all the time and (when we’re apart) he never leaves me wondering if he actually likes me or not! We are honest and forthcoming with each other and communicate very regularly about uncomfortable things: his girlfriend and living arrangements, his tax situation (most recently), the fact that I will probably be roommates with Things #1 and #2 for quite some time yet… I expect we will continue to be transparent with each other, because that is our foundation.
Every time something ends with a guy, I want to run back.
Maybe it’s because I don’t know how to deal with feelings of loss.
Maybe it’s because I want to stay with what’s familiar.
Maybe it’s fear that I won’t be able to find something as good. I mean, the relationship has ended, but it was something. If that something wasn’t good, I probably wouldn’t have stuck around for as long as I did (or want to go back, for that matter).
This Tuesday was Alaska‘s birthday. He asked me to make him an ice cream cake and spend the evening (night) with him.
We had a fun play session with the new riding crop I got him as a gift. He totally loves it. He says it makes a better sound than any of his other impact toys back in Anchorage.
He also managed to fit in a couple smacks with the good ole, tried and true switch that I cut for him a couple months ago (he likes the marks it makes)…
But, that’s not what I am going to tell you about here. LOL!
Before playtime started, we happened to be watching Everybody Hates Chris on MTV and the following commercial for one of their new shows came on:
It’s a new fantasy series!
ON MTV!!!!!
And it looks really fucking good… Thing #1 and I are really excited to find out if it’s as good as it looks.
I mentioned that to Alaska when the commercial finished.
It looks kind of like they’re choking each other, doesn’t it?
Living with my ex-husband…
I’ve been thinking: at some point in the near future, I am going to have to tell Doom-n-Gloom that I am going ou on a date or that I am interested in someone and seeing (fucking) them ‘on the regular’. Especially since I am spending more and more nights away from home: sometimes 2 nights at Alaska’s, and there’s Mr. R… And every once in a while I am still swiping on Tinder (but not really meeting anyone – lots of chatting).
image from giphy.com
I used to give Loserman money like it was going out of style.
And the fact that Doon-n-Gloom is still living with me after we’re divorced also speaks to my generosity stupidity.
I don’t know if I was trying to buy their love or just being nice.
Probably a little bit of both.
Sometimes I wonder if I am too overly critical of my partner. (Ya think?)
I mean, I am too overly critical of myself…
Do I intentionally pick someone who cannot give me what I need and then hold them to some unachievable expectation?
Then they can never be what I truly want/desire in a partner?
Smitten with Him 