Long Term
I was completely blind(side)ed by Loserman when he stopped talking to me.
Finally, after a solid year without him (*mostly), I think I am able to start sorting things out.
6 Months
It’s been a little over a week since Mick had his flashback.
We have since spent another Thursday night, Friday evening and Sunday afternoon together – with and without kink and completely without incident.
Other than the two posts (Sharing Space and Mind and About Last Night), I haven’t written about it because my emotions have been pretty scrambled.
Thursday night was special to me because Mick accidentally let me see a part of his inner self. But after that, *he* was having issues with letting his guard down too much with me and *I* was having issues with liking him too much.
Spending Friday night with Alaska was supposed to help put some distance between Mick and me. Instead, it put more distance between Alaska and me (which is what needed to happen anyway).
Letting Go
It occurred to me last Thursday morning that, maybe I am holding back on really liking Alaska because I am holding on to Loserman so tightly.
Why? I don’t know. There is still a part of me deep inside that wants him back, that yearns for his body to hold mine against his…
“Fall for You”
Fall for You
by Leela James
Here we are, together
And everything between us is good
I’m right here in this cloud, baby
Ready to fly but before I take
Another step
Would you catch me if I fall for you?
‘Cause I’m falling
I’m falling, I’m falling
I’m so used to standing
So used to being on my own
But this thing is new, baby
It feels like I’m losing control
I’ll take another step
If you catch me when I fall for you
‘Cause I’m falling
I’m falling, I’m falling
Will you promise to be there?
Stay by my side always?
Whenever I need you
Don’t let me down, no, no
If I give you my all, don’t let me fall
Would you do that for me, hold me?
Will you love, will you love me?
My heart is ready
For love and to be loved
And I chose you, baby
That’s the one thing I’m sure of
So I will take this one last step
So catch me, I’m falling for you
I’m falling
I’m falling, I’m falling
… … …
To Be Loved
I don’t want to be dominated
I don’t want to be owned
I don’t want to be humiliated, marked or tied up…
I just want to be wanted
…to be cherished
…to be loved
I want to fall asleep, and wake, knowing my heart is safe…