Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

Trying Something New

So, I have mentioned a couple of times here that I am trying to build my own Network Marketing business

I even wrote a post asking my readers to check it out and let me know what they think of it

A few actually did

Now I am here again asking for your support in my new-ish endeavor

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Too Much Power

Since last September, I’ve been spending a lot of time inside my head. It was a tough time to recover from: Mick’s verbal harassment, moving, having my car stolen…

Shit! Just a move by itself is enough to send a person’s life into topsy-turvies…

I ended up dragging a couple of very special people into my drama, then seemingly dropped off the planet. There’s no excuse for that. I was simply a scared kitten.

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Car Stress

Mick has really been quite a hero the past couple of weeks.

My roller skates broke and he fixed my old pair for me so I could skate while I was waiting for my replacements to arrive.


Since then, my replacements have arrived and been customized to my standards 😉 and I think I actually like the old ones better now… but that’s another story… back to the hero part…

Breezy has needed front wheel bearings for quite some time. I purchased the parts and Mick did the work. We spent the Sunday afternoon together. First I had some things I needed to get off my chest but after that it was him working and me asking questions. Car fixing fun!! Soon we’ll be fixing the rest of Breezy’s littler issues. It’s such a relief!

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Argh!!!!!!!! Skater Down!

Saturday night my roller skates broke. Well, one of them anyway… *sigh*

I just got them in January! A month before I went to Phoenix!!


Broken Skate 1

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Sorry to interrupt my regularly scheduled programming


My facebook timeline is all mixed up….

Half of the updates are happy skating updates (some of my friends went on a skate cruise last weekend!) and family posts about loved ones…

Silly and uplifting memes…

And the other half is about hate crimes and civil rights violations… Police brutality and street violence… Our youth rioting… More kids bringing weapons to school…

Looting and burning…

Image result for baltimore riots 2015

Some of my Skate Family is right in the middle of it! They called off last night’s Skate Night.

It’s so sad to see all of this happening again… Over and over again…

Please do me a favor and reach out to someone your normally wouldn’t and tell them that they are special and that they mean something.

And, when someone asks you for help, reach out and help them!






My heart aches for the City of Baltimore, which saw riots following the funeral of 25-year old Freddie Gray, who died while in police custody due to severe spinal cord injuries.

As a Buddhist and a follower of the teachings of Gandhi and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., I both understand, but cannot condone, the violence that has erupted. I have no easy answers for either those enraged by the continued racial injustice, or those appalled by the violent rioting and looting the whole world is seeing.

Many say there can be no peace without justice, but so, too, can there be no true justice without peace. The riots must end before any progress can be made; progress must be made so that riots have their end.

What none of us should do is remain silent or indifferent. Tonight and in the coming days, hold your children, your families, your loved ones. Talk to them, and your friends and co-workers, about your feelings and theirs, and understand the passions that underlay them. All of us in our own way care deeply about both the symptoms and the manifestations of this disease that plagues our nation and indeed the world. To recognize this shared desire for both justice and peace is the first step towards both.

George Takei

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Word of the Day: Compassion


Excerpts taken from Compassion is Unreasonable on Om Swami

(I recommend clicking the link above and reading the entire article. It’s not much longer, and better, than the little I have reposted here.)

…Compassion is in fact an unreasonable emotion. It is not really based on any reasoning. For, mind is the seat of reasoning whereas it is heart for the compassion. As a behavior, compassion may well be supported by some reason, but as an emotion, a feeling, it is neither supported nor triggered by any reason. Behavior can be deceptive but feelings, because they live inside you, cannot be artificial. They are what they are.

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Fuck that Fucking Fucker!

I only had to ask the same exact question three fucking times to get an answer that he probably doesn’t mean anyway…



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Fixing Breezy

Loserman was supposed to help me replace the alternator in Breezy Saturday. Help me do it.

But before that could happen, last Monday afternoon I got a text from him:

I can work on Breezy tomorrow (Tuesday) since it’s supposed to be warm.

So, Tuesday morning before I left for work, I put $100 in the trunk along with the new alternator and belt. The cash was supposed to be his payment – time/labor/trip charge, whatever… He’s my mechanic now or Loserman, not my “boyfriend” or AP (or loverman).

He didn’t come over Tuesday as planned. I was hardly surprised. I wasn’t at the forefront of his radar before, why would I be now?

At 3:30 Tuesday afternoon, I got the following message:

Hey, wanted to let you know that I didn’t get a chance to put the alternator on due to I was babysitting and now going to take a nap. I will do it tomorrow.

I simply texted back, “Okay”.

Earlier, I had decided that for each day he was late in replacing my alternator, I was going to take away $20 from his payment. I didn’t tell Loserman.

Tuesday night, before I went to bed, I took $20 out of the trunk.

I didn’t hear from him again until I was getting ready to go to lunch Wednesday afternoon, when we had the following text conversation (Loserman is Red and I am Blue):


I needed to know if the core and the new belt were in there with the receipts so I could get my $53 back.

Also, I left his roller skates in the trunk for him to take “home” (and I was feeling a bit passive-aggressive, I’ll admit it). They were a birthday gift from me 2 years ago. I figured that, if he wasn’t going to be skating with me, he might as well have them to skate. His old ones are falling apart and are held together with duct tape.


Nice. Burned again.

If he’s returning the skates I gave him (and he’d better be careful, I might just donate the fuck out of them!), does that mean I have to return the things that he gave me?

Because I don’t want to.

I am using the speakers he put in my truck, and the sunroof motor. However, I have thought about giving back the Cartier Delices he gave me. Smelling like that is heavenly, but it reminds me of him…


Is This Too Bitchy?

I have now corrected a closing document 6 times this morning for this girl…


It would be very helpful if you would please do your due diligence to ensure that the closing files are complete and correct when they are first sent to me. I sent out an email to you on the 15th of May asking for much of this information and the details provided to me were incorrect.

I want to be as helpful as possible. However, I manage this process for 3 different offices, several other agents and have other accounting duties as well. Some days I honestly do not have the time to spend correcting continual mistakes.

That being said, please review this PDF and let me know if it is correct. If there are multiple changes that need to be made, please make me aware of them all at once.

Your help and cooperation is greatly appreciated

~ Me


Happy Friday, everyone! Have an awesome Memorial Day Weekend!


Broken: Day 10 (Pay it Forward)

The World's Largest Roller Coasterat Fuji-Q Highland amusement park

The World’s Largest Roller Coaster
at Fuji-Q Highland amusement park

Please forgive me, I will be very random in this post… My Percocet is finally kicking in this morning and I am starting feel a little numb again (and my home computer sucks ASS!).

These past 10 days have been a total roller coaster — mostly of scariness.

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Scary Things That Upset Me

  • There were a couple days that people just sat there and watched me struggle with my crutches: while carrying a backpack, a purse and trying to open a freaking door. Just sat there and watched me struggle! Those were some pretty frustrating and angry times for me.
  • Insurance companies! I can’t believe how very un-helpful they truly are. Last Thursday afternoon was completely wasted on being transferred and disconnected and forgotten on hold – and ultimately, after someone finally told me they knew how to help me, the problem still isn’t resolved because that person hasn’t returned my call.
  • Crutches! My apartment is on the 3rd floor of our complex. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind the exercise I am getting as a result of going up and down those stairs (and my bedroom is in our loft, on top of it all (pun intended) LOL), but I am scared to death that one of these times, when I am ascending alone, I am just going to fall backwards… Aaaahhhhhh!!!…. And everything takes SO long.
  • I can’t roller skate – Saturday night was total hell for me! My youngest daughter felt sorry for me and spent the night watching How To Train Your Dragon with me but Saturday Night Skating has been happening for over 2 years now. It felt strange…
  • I can’t do my Yoga. My body feels so stiff and tight – I’ve been stretching the best that I can but it’s just not the same.
  • I can’t even go on my daily lunch walks (and the weather has been just phenomenal here!!!)
  • Handicapped Parking – it’s kind of a joke.
Guardian Angelby Arunas Zilys

Guardian Angel
by Arunas Zilys

Refreshing and Happy Things That Give Me Hope

  • There were days where people were practically racing (and practically fighting) to open the door/s for me or to help me carry my things. There are definitely more good people than bad — the bad ones are just so discouraging.
  • My boss loaned me money so I could pay 1/4th of the 30% co-pay for my surgery. She gave me no timeline to pay her back.
  • AFLAC — Oh! My! God! I am SO glad it is offered at my new job. I don’t care how much $$ they give me, I will love every single penny of it (because otherwise i have no idea how I am going to pay these hospital bills, etc…)
  • The Office/Patient Coordinator at my Orthopedist. She is going to deal with all my insurance company issues because “it’s my job and I have some contacts at these insurance companies that can help me. It’s your job to get better and, to help you get better faster, just let me handle these problems for you.” What a lovely-spirited lady – Ashley, my angel of the week!
  • The Denver Broncos (Go, Broncos!)
  • Loverman!!! He spent his entire Friday last week waiting for me at the Surgical Center (he brought a bag of donuts with him, though, and I wasn’t supposed to eat anything. That made me laugh because the nurses didn’t let him hear the end of it!) And after it was all done, he carried me up 2.5 flights of stairs to make sure I made it home safe!!! (The husband watched the whole thing! That was like the frosting on my cake because, the night before, I asked the husband if he wants his daughters to marry a man like him — the husband, not Loverman… Again, he just got very angry at me and completely avoided the question – he deflected it.)
  • The Doctors and Nurses that performed my surgery and all of the staff there.
  • My totally awesome daughters and friends! I had no idea how many people care about me (and how hard it is to ask for help!).

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Sarah Larsonw/ George Clooney

Sarah Larson
w/ George Clooney

I think this broken ankle (partially) was my bad karma for inviting Loverman to the holiday party instead of the husband.  Also, the last Saturday night that LM and I spent together (I meant to write and tell you all about it. It was an orgasmic evening/night. One I will remember for a long time… But my life kind of got a little hectic so I haven’t been able to tell you like I wanted to.) I covered it up with a really bad lie (I know, I know – there aren’t any good lies…). A lie that the husband almost called me out on.

I have my follow-up appointment on the 14th – they will change the dressing and let me know if everything is healing as it should…

December 15th is our office holiday party! I am still very excited (because Loverman is going with me) but I am also disheartened because I have such an AWESOME party dress and my biggest accessory will be this huge cast 😦

Tomorrow I am going back to work. I could have been there the last two days, but my awesome boss told me to take this much time off “just because”. Also, I am NOT looking forward to the daily struggle of trying to get around like a “well person”. My temper runs short and it’s difficult not to focus on the angry…

I am grateful to everyone. Even the nasty people who are so anti-helpful — because, without them, I would not appreciate the true awesome-ness of all the helpful people out there.

So, (as a favor to me) please remember to:

Pay It Forward

And the world will be a better place!!!


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