Aside

On: Hating Myself

Last week Alaska and I were talking about general things and, I don’t remember how the subject of self-esteem came up, but it did.

I told Him that, every morning while I am doing my yoga, I repeat over and over to myself: “I am light, I am love, I am a gift.” (I have been doing this since mid-January.)

But, even though I repeat that mantra to myself day after day, I am still unable to feel love for myself.

I mean, I think I am a cool person, and I believe that I am indeed light and love and a gift and all that, but I still don’t love myself.

In fact, for all the good things that I allegedly am, I still pretty much hate myself.

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Everything Must End (aka This Cannot Possibly Last Forever)

Everything is a Dichotomy by Ratta
Everything is a Dichotomy
by Ratta

When I was a teenager I had a mantra to help get me through things that I wasn’t enjoying (mostly church). I would sit next to my parents on that stupid wooden pew and, in my head, I would chant:

This cannot possibly last forever, nothing lasts forever. This cannot possibly last forever, nothing lasts forever.

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