Aside

Gifts

Someone sent me a gift box last Friday.

Unfortunately I was off promoting Rollerbrights with my crew in Nebraska when it was delivered and I didn’t get it until yesterday (Monday).

I received a message from him while we were at dinner Friday night which surprised the hell out of me! He had asked a while back for an address where he could send me something he’d gotten for me, but it completely slipped my mind.

In my package there was gorgeous set of notepads, my (new) favorite movie and a pair of silver hoop earrings.

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More Contact from My Catfish

This guy won’t let go, and the funniest thing about it is: he has already said “Good-bye” to me.

At the beginning of our conversations, he told me that instead of saying “Good-bye” when someone leaves or a talk ends, he always says “Peace” to them instead.

True to that, whenever we talked on the phone, he always ended our talks with “Peace”.

He explained to me that “Good-bye” was too final; that he only says “Good-bye” to people who have died, or he is severing his ties with them.

He said “Good-bye” to me when I ended things with him New Years Eve.

But then, after his “Good-bye“, he texted me some psycho-manipulative bullshit while I was on my skate trip to Houston.

At which point he told me he wouldn’t “bother” me again.

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The Kisser: Kinky Talk

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I like almost everything kinky… sex outside… spanking… some light humiliation… bondage when done correctly… and I would love to go to a sex club!

Really?! I’ve wanted to try Mon Chalet for a while now. I don’t know of any others…

Awesome cool! It’s kinda neat there. I’ve only been once and during the day.

Nice. Just kinda neat?

That was a mild understatement. I wish I could have seen more.

I want to hear more about the bondage and humiliation…

Like calling me a dirty slut, tying me to the bed while you eat me out… Force-feeding your cock to me…

I will seriously try just about anything with someone I trust and who treats me well.

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Monday Motivation: Promises

Monday Motivation: Promises

If you make them

Keep them

Please?

Last week, Scorpio was supposed to call me before Wednesday night to confirm our date.

He didn’t.

I wasn’t surprised or angry, but I was disappointed.

He promised he wouldn’t forget.

And, technically, he didn’t. He called me while I was driving home from work Wednesday night and asked, “Are we still on for tonight?”

I expected this actually, so my response was easy, “I was waiting to hear back from you and when you didn’t confirm, I didn’t know if I should plan anything for us.”

He thought about it for a second and then replied, “Oh, yeah. You’re totally right. I’m really sorry I forgot.”

“It’s okay,” and then I said, playfully, “It’s your loss.”

“I know, huh,” he acknowledged. “Where are you right now?”

“I’m on my way home from work,” then I told him my actual location in traffic. “Where are you right now?” I asked.

“Downtown,” then he told me the cross-streets, “I just got off work and I thought, if we were going to do something tonight, maybe you could pick me up. But, since I forgot to confirm with you, I’ll just take the bus.”

I had an idea. “Well, I’m in a good place to come pick you up and give you a ride home? That way I could see you tonight anyway. Even if it’s just for a little while. Does that sound like something you could go for?”

“That would be really awesome!”

“Okay. It will take me like 30 minutes to get there, okay?”

“Okay, beautiful. Thank you!”

We discussed exactly where he was and where we would meet. He explained to me that his phone was dying and our call might get disconnected.

It didn’t then, but it did die before I tried to call him back later.

When he wasn’t where we had agreed he would wait.

Big fucking surprise, right?

Finally, as I’m putting money in the meter, he wanders out of the building where he was working, “Hey, babe. Have you been waiting long?”

“Yeah. About 15 minutes. I’ve been wandering around looking for you.”

“Sorry about that,” he said. “I was upstairs talking to the security guard and I didn’t see you pull up.”

“Okay, cool. I’m glad you’re still here and didn’t leave.” (I was only like 10% mad at this point – mildly irritated, I guess. Or incensed.)

(But, Seriously! OMFG!! He knew I was coming, and that his phone was dying, and he didn’t wait in the lobby by the windows like we had planned. Sound like Loserman a little? *sigh*))

We hugged and he put his stuff in the back seat then asked if we could walk down to 7-11, he wanted to pick up a Black & Mild.

“Sure, no problem,” I said. Because it wasn’t. There was money in the meter and it was a nice evening. He put his arm out and we strolled arm-in-arm one block to the 7-11.

After all that was over and we were on the road, Scorpio said, “Okay. I know you’re going to laugh at me because I keep asking this, but what day are we leaving on that skate trip?”

He was right. I did laugh. I laughed because I have told him every single time that I have seen him for the last two months that it’s over Valentine’s weekend – we’ll be leaving really early on the morning of Friday the 13th. I even printed out the flyers for it and gave them to him!

After I was done with my giggle-fit, I explained it to him all over again. Then I looked him straight in the eyes and asked, “Are you still going to go on this trip with me?”

“Of course I am,” He replied.

I asked again, “Are you sure? If you cancelled at the last minute it would totally suck.”

“Yeah, babe. I’m still planning on going with you,” he reassured me.

(He sure doesn’t seem very excited about it. Don’t other people get excited about going on vacation?! Or is it just me?!?!?!)

We talked some more about what time we need to leave on Friday morning, what time the Friday night rooftop party starts, what we were going to wear…

I asked him if he would be able to help me check out the car (Breezy) on Sunday afternoon (yesterday) to make sure he was ready for the long drive.

He said that he thought he would be able to because he would already be working on a friend’s car Sunday, too.

But he would get back to me Saturday night for sure.

He promised.

I said, “Don’t forget about me this time,” then I winked at him and leaned in for a kiss.

He returned my kiss and reassured me, “I won’t forget this time. I promise. Cross my heart.”

“Okay,” I was satisfied. We talked a little more, he went into his house and I returned home.

And…

He forgot about me Saturday night.

Surprised?

Nope. Not any more. It seems I am very forgettable!

So…

Sunday I did the oil change and checked fluids on Breezy with Thing #1.

Here’s what *I* have to say about promises today:

Ha!

Ha!

Fucking!

Ha!

The Sweetest Gift!

The Sweetest Gift!

Saturday night Loverman got to go skating with me. Again. I was so happy I think I was glowing.

Afterwards, we chatted for a while in my truck before I dropped him off and went back home. Usually, on my skate nights, I have to park far away from our building because I get there so late that all the good spots are taken. Then, sometime on Sunday, I move Bear closer to our building when a spot opens up.

This night wasn’t any different. But Sunday was.

This week, Loverman stopped by and moved my truck closer to my apartment while I was watching the football game.

As a surprise.

And, while he was moving it, he put my birthday present in the back seat.

After he left, he called me and asked how the Broncos were doing.

We chatted for a minute and then he asked, “I left something in Bear last night after skating. Can you please go out and check if it’s in there?”

“What did you leave?”

“I think I dropped my I-pod. Why don’t you have your mini-me (Thing #1) go check and see, I know your knee is probably hurting after skating last night,” he replied. “Can you put her on the phone?”

“I’ll go check. I have to move the truck anyway, so I might as well do both. Here she is.” I handed her the phone and got up from the couch to change into more ‘outside-appropriate’ clothes to move the truck and look for his I-pod. As I was changing, I was also listening to the one-sided conversation and I finally started to figure out what was going on.

Talk about dense. I really should have figured things out earlier, but Loverman had already said Happy Birthday to me when I dropped him off after skating at 1:00AM. He never has any money and this time he told me he only had $5 left, so I was happy with the words and that he even remembered — and the fact that he got to come skating me again this Saturday!

While they were talking, Loverman instructed Thing #1 to go out to Bear with me, but not to spoil the surprise.

She returned the phone to me and I continued talking to him as we walked out to the truck, unlocked it and started to look for his I-pod.

Thing #1 spoke up from the back seat, “Found it!” and handed me my birthday gift from Loverman, “It was here in the back on the floor next to your roller skates.”

TheSweetestGift

The card says, on the outside:

Another birthday and you’ve still got it

And on the inside:

So flaunt it!

And have a great day

Then he wrote his own words to me:

Happy Happy Birthday and many more!!!
Your Best Friend,
Loverman

It was so sweet. It melted my heart.

The card said the most perfect words about his feelings to me and,  what he said might seem very contrite to an outsider, but he has to be extremely careful what he writes to me because just about anyone could see it; there are people who know we’re married to other people, and to them we are best friends.

I thanked him and giggled at him. I wanted to kiss and hug him all over! Which is probably why he left before he called to tell me about my surprise.

Even Though He Was Sick

Even Though He Was Sick

… he still kissed me when we met up very briefly yesterday morning.

He never kisses me when he’s sick.

He asked how I was doing and I answered, “I’m okay, but you could text me back more. How are you?” Then I winked at him because he knew exactly what I was talking about (click here and guess the password 😉 if you haven’t already).

“I know, Mamacita. I’ve been sick. So mostly I’ve been sleeping.”

“Oh my goodness! You’re sick and you kissed me anyway. There’s a first time for everything!”

“Yes, Mama. You’re the one always telling me,” then he started pretending to talk like me, “‘I’ll be okay. I don’t know why you don’t just kiss me already. Jeesh!‘ So, I just kissed you.”

He makes me laugh.

Usually I have to beg for a kiss when he’s sick and then he will totally fake me out and turn his face at the last minute so I end up kissing his cheek.

He must have missed me.

Kiss on the Cheek by nyappykimi
Kiss on the Cheek
by nyappykimi
Surprise!

Surprise!

If you’re one of my regular readers, you know that I go roller skating mostly every Saturday night. Lately, I have been going alone, but Thing #1 used to come with me. And, a long, long time ago, Loverman used to skate Saturdays with me.

Recently, there has been a sexy Skaterman who has been trying to capitalize on my solitude. He likes to take me out for pancakes after skating and woo me with words that will never turn unto actions. Last Saturday he texted me again to find out if I would be solo.

R U rollin’ tonight?

Yessir!

R U solo?

I think so.

The truth is, I didn’t want to answer his second question. I wished I wasn’t skating alone. I wanted a buffer — Thing #1 or Loverman… Anything! Because last week I told him I didn’t want to do this any more.

I guess Skaterman isn’t convinced that I completely love my Loverman (rightly so. I led him to believe it.) and he is taking advantage of my seeming indecision. Except that last week, I thought I was very clear to him that I am not willing to play whatever game that Skaterman is playing. *shrug*

(Request) Surprise Hug From Russia by tabbycat1212
(Request) Surprise Hug From Russia
by tabbycat1212

Loverman was scheduled to work that night so I wished really really hard that he would be there, but I knew it probably wouldn’t help
His work starts at 10 and so does skating.

It turns out that supervisor called and told him that there were too many people scheduled and Loverman shouldn’t go in that night.

So, Loverman surprised me at the skating rink!

It was the most amazing feeling!!

And he didn’t let go of me all night, while Skaterman watched.

Hopefully Skaterman got that message! 😉

It’s The Thought That Counts

It’s The Thought That Counts

Marijuana-Leaf

You may already have deduced this, but I am a chronic weed smoker. Been that way for over 20 years. Kids know, parents don’t.

I smoke it to calm my anxiety. It’s like my Xanax. It has been that way my entire adult life. I also have a seizure disorder, so I smoke to avoid some of that bullshit. Seizures suck — for me and all the people around when it happens (and I totally hate the way prescription seizure meds make me feel. Been there. Done that).

I live in Colorado, where it’s now 100% legal for 21+ and has been medically legal since before I moved here 7.5 years ago.

I have a Caregiver who grows some of the most mind-blowing buds you will ever smoke. She is totally awesome. Not only is she my medical-marijuana Caregiver, she’s like the mom I always wish mine was. Once a month I go over to her house and pick up my “prescription” and we have a mini-therapy session. I love that woman!

It’s very likely that the amount of pot I smoke in a day would fuck most of you up for the better part of a week. Every once in a while, I skip a few days and let the THC and Cannabanoid levels in my body lower, but not very often. It’s very rare you will find me without marijuana on my person in some form.

I love the feeling of serenity and inner peace that I feel when I am high. It also helps me to focus my scattering thoughts on just one thing. And, unlike alcohol, it does not lower my inhibitions. I’m just sane(r).

There are times when you can tell that I am stoned and there are times when you would never, ever suspect. I have been high for so long that my coping mechanism, in this aspect, is quite impressive.

Anyway… The point of my telling you all of this is so I could tell you a very short and sweet story-within-a-story.

Last Thursday night was an amazing date night for me with Loverman. I tried something new and acted a little differently on the advice of a new friend.

When we left each other Friday morning, Loverman said to me, “There’s something for you in your truck. But don’t look for it, it will ruin the surprise! Let me tell you about it later today.”

OMG! How cute, right? So, I said, with a twinkle in my eye, “Okay, baby. I will try not to look, but if I find it on accident don’t be mad.”

“Mamacita!” (he calls me that all the time) “You better not. I want it to be a surprise. You would never find it on accident.”

I did what I was told and I didn’t look for it (much) and I definitely didn’t find anything.

At 4:45PM I received the following text:

Your surprise is in the driver’s door. It’s a small baggie. This guy didn’t want to go into work with it so he gave it to me to throw away.

I honestly think my face actually lit up! It’s bit deviant, but how totally sweet! At his security job he confiscated someone’s bag of weed and then he saved it for me!

When I got home I checked the door where he said and found a tiny bag of shake. I suspected that it was going to be pretty bad stuff but I really didn’t care because he thought of me!

I responded:

You’re so sweet! Sometimes you amaze the hell out of me. I love my surprise!

Because I did. Super-bad-ditch-weed or not.

You know why it’s even more of a surprise? Because Loverman has been trying to get me to stop smoking pot since he met me.

While we were on our sk8venture last November, we got into a pretty big disagreement (for us. We hardly ever disagree. 6 years and 3 ‘fights’) and I was wound tight as a spring. As we finished up our heated discussion in his truck and got ready to go into the hotel, I told him I needed to smoke up to calm down and I asked if he wanted to join me. He said, “No, babe, but you are more than welcome. Just don’t stay out here too long” then he went inside.

When I got back to the room he was lying in bed watching something on TV and I asked if I could get into bed with him. I was relaxed and apologized for the crazy-me from earlier and we made up…

I should have just told him I needed to get high earlier and I think we could have avoided an entire night of stress, but he didn’t want me to be doing drugs so I was trying not to.

I think that’s when he started to understand more about why I smoke it and just accept the fact that I do. Frequently when I am with him I am high, but I have never smoked in front of him.

It turned out to be super-bad-ditch-weed. LOL! But I don’t give a shit.

Because it really is the thought that counts.

Tying Up Some Loose Ends

Tying Up Some Loose Ends

status_update

Thing #1’s ovarian cyst went away just like it was supposed to about 2 weeks ago. Now she has absolutely no excuse not to go to beauty school every single day!

ABC hasn’t called back 😦 or sent me an email, to let me know if I was picked for the Nightline episode on infidelity and on-line dating. I thought they told me the episode would air the 21st. It couldn’t have been June 21st because the show didn’t air that night. So, not all hope is lost I guess.

Attorney-man never called me back about a date. He emailed me twice after the initial contact this spring. The second one was to tell me to be patient with him, he just switched jobs and was very busy. Which is honestly true. He’s a connection of mine on LinkedIn.

My next sk8-venture with Loverman has been cancelled. The actual event was cancelled because the rink that was hosting it closed down last month. Great planning on their part, eh? I found out about 3 weeks ago and told Loverman. We haven’t made replacement plans yet and, judging by the way things have been going recently, I’m not sure I want to reschedule a new one (at least not with him).

And the best news of all — I got an email from Mr. AM this morning! We were originally not supposed to meet again until next Tuesday, but this was waiting in my in-box for me this morning:

Monday-Morning-Email

Ooooohhhh! I like him SO much! He is very no-nonsense. That email even gave me goosebumps!

My response:

Monday-Morning-Response

I can’t even begin to tell you how excited I am for tomorrow night!

It’s like next week jumped into my lap and yelled “Surprise!”

Surprise!

Surprise!

Last night I wanted to surprise Loverman by showing up to watch him at his Thursday night bowling league. I’ve been there several times in the past and I just happened to have some extra time on my hands (and I was missing the hell out of him and Coconut 😉 )

Check out this funky “bowling” playlist
I was also thinking that some of it would be great to use as roller skating jams…

… Because last night was the choir’s Senior Concert and my daughters were both in it (Before you say, “Hey, shouldn’t you be going to your daughters’ choir concert instead of hanging out with your boyfriend?“, hear me out) and I didn’t want to be home alone with the husband (if I could avoid it) so I found something else to do instead.music notes

For some background (because I have attended it for all of the past 3 years … 😉 ) the Senior Concert is very, very long and they perform on both Thursday and Friday nights. Thursday night is basically a very full and busy dress rehearsal. But during the Friday night concert, each senior has their names announced separately so the parents and friends of each senior can shower them with flowers or chocolates or a card or something. So, I am going tonight

When I got to the bowling alley, first I went through the parking lot to look for my truck — because I had a little “I can’t wait to see you again” note that I wanted to leave for him to find when he finished up with bowling (I got the idea from this totally awesome website — The Dating Divas). Next I found a really good parking spot, which always makes me happy because I don’t like taking the Handicapped spaces if I don’t have to…

When I got inside, I immediately saw the lane where their team was bowling — that was nice! So, I went directly to the vending area and ordered up my Loverman some dinner (because even though I didn’t actually know, I knew that he hadn’t eaten anything yet all day — he kind of forgets to eat and I “get to” remind him, I like it… I think it’s cute…) — Grilled Cheese sandwich, French Fries and a Cherry Coke! Then I hobbled over to the lane where he was so I could sit down and wait for the food (and spectate).

I wanted to see how long I could sit there before Loverman noticed me, but his brother was already sitting there figuring scores because their first game was almost over. We had a short and sweet conversation about how I was there “just for a minute” to say Hi! to Loverman and his brother said “better make it a short minute then…” (he thinks I distract Loverman too much when they’re bowling. It’s funny because I probably do, but when we’re with his brother I am only Loverman’s “friend” that happens to be a girl). Then, one of his teammates spotted me and said something to me about my broken-ness.

So much for sneaking up on him… But, of course he was still surprised! He had no idea I was going to show up…

I wish you could have seen the look on his face when Loverman turned around and saw me standing there! He beamed! His face lit up! Seeing his reaction, I felt so warm and wanted and cozy and loved! He came straight over to me and put his arm around my waist (in a very “that’s my girl” kind of way) and gave me a great big bear hug! Then it was his turn to bowl.

Bowling Alley Grilled Cheese & Fries

Eventually they delivered the food — strangely, Loverman was surprised that I ordered it. I don’t know why, because I am forever making sure that he has eaten! And again I got that wonderful, strong, loving arm around my waist (along with all the nice warm fuzzies!) — but this time, right before he walked away he gave me two very well-timed and well-hidden smacks on my derrière! He did it again later when he was coming back to talk to me — and now it was my turn to be surprised!! He is the one to be reminding me (before we go someplace) that I need to behave myself (no kissing or butt-smacking) and that we are only friends in certain company (like for my office Holiday Party or when I go to watch him bowl).

I was only there for one of the games. Mostly because I had to get back to my kids by a certain time (because they didn’t know I would be 25 minutes away from them when they called me to pick them up), but also a little because his brother really didn’t want me there as a distraction.

Their team won their first and second games. But after I left, they lost the 3rd game.