Smitten with Him

grown-up stuff happens here sometimes

New Addition

Meet my “new” doggie: Tori

She’s a Newfoundland

We’ve been together 10 weeks now

She was surrendered to the shelter after living with the same family for 10 years (her whole fucking life – and they just let her go)!!

I don’t know all of her story, but I wish I did

It would probably make it easier to understand her

She’s afraid of all other dogs, to the point she wants to attack them before they can attack her

But then, I am kind of afraid of all other people to the point I want to attack them before they can attack me, so maybe we’re well-matched Read the rest of this entry »

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My Stolen Self


I hate you for stealing me from myself

I am so broken that all I can see is the ugly in people

Taking advantage of those who are generous

Lying, cheating and stealing to get what they want

Or to hurt someone deeply

Intentionally

And I am becoming that person

I’ve lost my trust

My willingness to help

It’s so hard to be nice

To remember that everyone has a story I don’t know

My heart used to be eager

Innocent

But it’s dead now

Or maybe in a coma

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What Would “You” Do?

So…

If you were in a serous relationship with a guy for 16 months and just found out that he’s known he had another child since last Father’s Day, would it bother you? (she’s 14 – so he wasn’t cheating or anything)

If so, how would you handle it?

If not, why didn’t it bother you?

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Saying “I Love You”

Image result for saying i love you

Sometimes those three words are easy to say.

…to my daughters, my friends…

Other times, even thinking about their utterance is frightening.

I yearn to tell Alaska that I love him, but I don’t.

Is it fear of rejection?

I know he won’t reject me…

If he was going to reject me, it would have been long before now. Read the rest of this entry »

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The Kisser: Kinky Talk

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I like almost everything kinky… sex outside… spanking… some light humiliation… bondage when done correctly… and I would love to go to a sex club!

Really?! I’ve wanted to try Mon Chalet for a while now. I don’t know of any others…

Awesome cool! It’s kinda neat there. I’ve only been once and during the day.

Nice. Just kinda neat?

That was a mild understatement. I wish I could have seen more.

I want to hear more about the bondage and humiliation…

Like calling me a dirty slut, tying me to the bed while you eat me out… Force-feeding your cock to me…

I will seriously try just about anything with someone I trust and who treats me well.

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Mr. Player

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(Nice kitty!)

I was having a “lovely” conversation with a fella on Tinder (because I caved and signed back up *sigh*).

He seemed decent enough. Usually I swipe left on guys without a picture, but this guy had made an effort to write a profile and put his height in it, the words were spelled correctly, AND he made a challenge about having fun!

I figured, what the hell? If I don’t like him, I don’t have to keep talking to him.

As luck would have it, I did enjoy talking to him and, before taking things any further I wanted to see a picture of him.

So we exchanged numbers.

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Conversations With a Catfish #2

onlinedating

08/16/2016

Morning buttercup

Good morning

How is daddy’s special girl doing today??
By the way, daddy loves her voice and talking with her last night.

Thank you for saying so. It was nice talking with you, too. But I don’t think that I am able to commit to abstinence and being “all yours” yet like you want. I don’t want to jump into anything like that.

I’m not asking you to yet sweetheart

I must have misunderstood then. My apologies.

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No More Fakers

(It was difficult figuring a name for this post. It was either the name it got or “Online Predators”. Both seemed appropriate…)

I’ve had quite a few terrible online dating experiences over the past 16+ months since my sexy Loverman left: Twitter, Tinder, Craigslist, FetLife, Collarspace

Terrible enough that every single one of my online profiles has been deleted.

Except my blog

dilberthateeveryone

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6 Months

She Wants

It’s been a little over a week since Mick had his flashback.

We have since spent another Thursday night, Friday evening and Sunday afternoon together – with and without kink and completely without incident.

Other than the two posts (Sharing Space and Mind and About Last Night), I haven’t written about it because my emotions have been pretty scrambled.

Thursday night was special to me because Mick accidentally let me see a part of his inner self. But after that, *he* was having issues with letting his guard down too much with me and *I* was having issues with liking him too much.

Spending Friday night with Alaska was supposed to help put some distance between Mick and me. Instead, it put more distance between Alaska and me (which is what needed to happen anyway).

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I Miss Sex!

DearSex2

That is the short and simple answer to the question that I posed to myself last week

Why is Alaska’s absence driving me so batshit crazy!?!

Such a simple answer, really…

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